Tila Tequila, no doubt the embarrassment of all Vietnamese Americans and the biggest Asian freak show this side of the planet after Bai Ling, has told Extra
that, I quote, “ I was thinking about, like, retiring and, like, maybe
adopting a few kids of my own and, like, moving somewhere really far
away from Hollywood”. Bitch thinks she is Angelina Jolie. 

By the way, what is she retiring from? I understand whoring yourself
on cable TV and sleeping with anyone who can walk and breathe are
exhausting, but there is no need for an early retirement talk. Tila has
her sight set on Christina Ricci, saying that she was especially hot in ”Black Snake Moon”
and that the two of them would look really good together. I can hear
the sound of Christina packing her bags at her West Village apartment
right now—trying to catch the first flight out of the country tomorrow.

Tila also said, “Next up, I’m doing a lot more charity stuff because
I think that once you hit a certain goal, you should give back—I
definitely want to let people know more of a sweet side and my
compassionate side.” Is Tila offering free sex to anyone? Wait, she is
already doing that!