While it’s considered downright rude to be asking a lady her age, I’ll be perfectly honest with you guys: Yesterday, I turned 25. To kick the honesty up a notch, I’d like to make it known that 25 is among the least sexy ages to turn. There’s nothing sexy about being 25. Unlike turning 21 in the US, it’s already been four years since I’ve been allowed to purchase alcohol, go to clubs and partake in sin. There is absolutely no debauchery left at 25 that I haven’t accomplished in my quarter of a century life. Unless you consider a personalized birthday card from my future husband and Ninja Assassin, Rain, the ability to rent cars in the state of California and my new concern for anti-aging beauty products, debaucherous…

Long gone are the days of me going out and partying until sunrise, days of me regretting the days I went out and partied until sunrise and days I wished hot, sexy Kpop stars named Rain would just notice me already and declare an undying love for me:

And just in case any of you can’t read messy Korean handwriting, I’ve taken the liberty of translating what Rain wrote to me on my birthday card.

To be honest, I wasn’t present when Rain signed the card, but I’m pretty sure he sealed it with a kiss. Don’t lie, I know you all had a hard time resisting kissing that ’submit reply’ button when news broke out that it was my birthday yesterday.

Am I shitting you? Only about the chicken scratch. Aside from that, I’d just like to give a big shoutout to Rain and say OMG, THANK YOU SO MUCH. BEST BIRTHDAY EVER (!!!)